Not the Tea Party

October 13, 2011 at 12:29 PM

By RICH LEVY

One idea pushed by the media’s dimwitted, attractive slackers is "Occupy Wall Street is like the Tea party!" Here's your field guide.
Protest gear:
    Tea Party: Guns, flags, ammo.
    OWS: I-phones, flags, bongos.
Indicators of approximate education level:
    Tea Party: Social security, medicare, and Veteran's Benefit recipients, all demanding that the government stay out of their life.
    OWS: Bachelor's and post-grad degrees, with McJobs ads and middle-aged resumes’ in city trash cans.
How they got there:
    Tea Party: Cross-country buses chartered by billionaires’  front groups.
    OWS: Public transportation, fixie bikes, beater Civics given them by parents, sophomore year.
Largest debts:
    OWS: Crushing education loans, because their parents went broke, despite both working.
    Tea Party: A debt to all America - for GI Bill benefits, the old system of regulation which kept people  from ruin in a mortgage bubble or by predatory financial institutions, and 
    for Social Security and Medicare, which reflect the value Americans once placed on our seniors’ well-being.
Dramatic messaging:
    OWS: In amplifier-free areas, the shouting circles, where the speaker’s words are relayed by voice through the crowd.
    Tea Party: Spitting on Congressmen.
Graphic images:
    OWS: Hand-made signs with resolute, sometimes naive sloganeering.
    Tea Party: Pictures of our president depicted as witch doctor, pimp, watermelon-eating chucklehead, or, for diversity, Hitler.
Who are they speaking for?
    Tea Party: A cadre of sociopathic billionaires; and gigantic corporations which, having been recognized by the Court as people, now aspire to be gods, without possibility of crucifixion.
    OWS: The other 99% of us for whom the system is NOT rigged. 


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Posted by Medford on
I'm ipemrssed. You've really raised the bar with that.
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